Mommy Mondays: I'm a Mom first, and a friend second!

The following is the opinion of The Review Ballerina and though it may not be shared by everyone, it is a proud opinion!

When I was growing up, I was raised by my Aunt, Uncle, and Grandmother. Sadly, my Grandmother was not really a "Mom" to me but moreso a friend kind of position. The other sad part is I spent Sunday night through Friday morning with her, and only Friday night through Sunday afternoon with my Aunt and Uncle. So I really did not have the "parental" influence in my life as much as I should have. I've seen so many people in the generations after me (with my generation as their parents) become disrespectful, criminals, smart-mouthed, and more all because in this time for some reason society has stopped parenting. Well, I continue to do so.

I believe all children should do the following:

1. Respect your teachers/tutors/instructors/elders.

2. Respect the police and authority figures.

3. Say yes "Ma'am" and "Sir" to those older than you.

4. Do as your told, even if you don't want to do it.

5. Expect to be "embarrassed" in public as badly as you hoped embarrassing your parents would work.

6. Expect to come home and be afraid of the result, if you do not follow #2.

Why do I believe in these? Well, think back to when you were a child. You knew if you got in trouble with the police, your parent would be right there at the door to greet you and you knew what was about to happen was going to be worse than the talk you got from the police. Did you forget to do your homework and come home with a failing grade on your report card? Yeah, we didn't just get a "try harder next time" speech did we? Nope, we got 6 weeks of punishments and that grade better have been pulled back up by the end of that 6 weeks! Did you pitch a fit in public because you couldn't have ice cream because your parents told you to eat your vegetables? Nope, and you didn't have an electronic to occupy you either you had to listen to your parents talk all night about stuff you cared absolutely nothing about. 

Don't even get me started on how my Great Grandmother stabbed me in the elbows with a fork if I put my elbows on the table...and I still have the scars!

As parents, we are the guiding hand for our children to be able to survive in the world. Of course, we are there to support them, cheer them on, hold them when their heart is broken, take pictures of them in formal outfits, and we are their friend their entire lives, but... we are their parents first. Our daughter knows we expect her to do her chores every day. She's 10 years old and does more than most kids I know around us. In fact, at Christmas when I will be doing the dishes at the family get together, she is planning to help me while her older relatives won't and I am proud of her for that. She is rewarded for doing her chores, and buys her video games, stuffed animals, fast food meals, etc with that money and she is PROUD of herself for EARNING that money. How many kids today do you know around you, EARN their money? No, I don't mean walk up to the parent and ask for the money, or ask for something and the parent just buys it (like I did lol) I mean EARN IT? Exactly, it's a proud feeling she has when she does so, and it instills in her a level of respect not only for herself, but for the work she knows we do around the house as well.

Anyway, I rambled haha. The point is, lead your children. Don't let them lead you. They can't lead when they start a job right out of high school can they? They can't just call in and go "Eh, I don't feel like coming in today." can they? Nope, they'll get fired. They can't go rob a store just because they don't feel like earning a living can they? Nope, they'll end up with worse situations that'll follow them the rest of their lives. Did you get a call from the school because your student didn't want to listen to their teacher, and went toe to toe with them? Well, I don't know about you, but my kid would be worried to come home. 

On the other side of this though, my daughter knows I'm her friend. She knows she can come and sit with me and tell me she has a crush on ----- (yeah I'm not saying his name lol!!) and how it makes her feel. She knows she can tell me her dreams, her favorite movies and shows, her favorite music and songs, and more. One of my favorite things in the world is her running from her room or the dining room or wherever she is, just to happily tell me that something happened. This morning, it was to tell me about how in the cafeteria at school they offer sunbutter and jelly sandwiches with every lunch option. Not exactly hot off the press worthy, but she was excited to tell me this, and I listened and smiled and explained what those sandwiches used to represent in schools, and how it's great they don't anymore. 

But my daughter also knows when I go tell her to empty the dishwasher, and she gives me an attitude or puts it off, those electronics are gone for the rest of the day and there is no discussion about it or way to "earn them back". 

I am proud to say, I am a Mother first, and a friend second!! I know you other mothers are too! I'm proud she can give me a big hug, a kiss, be happy, and yet know where those lines are drawn. That makes me the proudest Mother ever!

Elizabeth is a wife to her wonderful husband, a work at home mother to her beautiful little girl and a blogger for some time now. When she isn't spending time with her "Livvybug", or laughing with her husband, she is looking for new review opportunities and writing or singing along to classic rock and pop music!

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